Sunday, September 30, 2007

I know you are not mine,yet I feel I still own you...I know we'll never be together,yet those memories of bonding I can't let go...I know you have to go,yet ...........................
It was just 2 years back,when WE couldn't stay without each other...beginning from messages,phone calls to love letters...no one could stop us...though we weren't like the other lovers meeting every now and then but every time we meet there was something special...very special...a feeling that would turn my entire soul topsy turvy...luvd it all...you were mine..my HERO...my first love
Today,when you were no more mine...I met you again...was the feeling there?did you feel the same excitement when I suddenly held your hand when a car came too close to me?when the begger on the road said "apki jodi salamat rahe",did you like me wished her words were true?
A few months back ,when on the rare occasions we would go out we were never tired of talking about how much we love each other,but...today we remained silent trying not to look into each others eyes...unspoken words...which spoke miles and will keep on echoing evry time I think of you.At times,when you would look upto me and when our eyes met,the sea of passion that i felt for you long time back and thought had dried up,seemed to be like a sleeping volcano,with the possibility of erupting time and again.
When you told me how happy you were with your new life,life where i didn't belong...I BELEIVED you..though there seemed to be a pain in your voice and your eyes spoke something else,i beleived you...I will ALWAYS beleive you.
I am glad you didn't notice the unshed tears in my eyes when you asked me to take care of myself when you woudn't be here with me any longer,I am glad I could make you beleive that I will be happy without you,I am glad you didn't notice my expression my heart dying to beg you to stay,I am glad i could make you beleive that I am in love once again..
I wish I would turn back and run into your arms...but I knew if i did that I cold never let you go..you are no longer mine...I scolded myself...
something was there and something will always be..no matter how much we deny or try to forget...neither of us can break the invisible connection between us...thanks for making me realize what love is...

Monday, September 24, 2007

SOLITUDE...can't live without it....

The other day;sitting on the roof of my building,I kept on lookin at the sky above trying to find a reason,
a reason of my lonliness.I was alone,lonely,sad...thoughts of separation recurred and blinded me,but i seemed to enjoy evry momment of those tiny droplets kissing my cheeks and reaching upto my lips.i couldn't miss the silence even for a momment.i seemed to be entangled with a rope of mystery with SOLITUDE.....it is a part of me,or rather it is me,my existence,i can't live without it....

Unknown

I,
have a face,have a mind
made of mindless atoms
whose frenzied motion
brings order to my thoughts today.

My thoughts,
my pains,joys,memories
nostalgic alternations of reality
behind whose hinted glasses i see you.

You,
met me,changed me..bade me farewell
a teardrop was a lens that day
broke my world to pieces;not colors
yet a cold smile returned to me
for in a pice of shattered glass
..... I saw you

My Shadow...

A moonlit night
but something is shnning bright..
Look from far,it appears a blur
Look from near,it appears a star.

Deep as the ocean,
fast like the storm
beautiful,yet grave
She seemed to end all rave.

'Who are you?
Someone new?'

I seemed to have
stumbled into a new world
that exists only in pauses
where words end without causes..

She stood under the frozen tree
with her lightning blue eye fixed on me,
Her ruby lips with a smile so wide
Nimbus hair like the waves of sea.

'Who are you?
someone new?'

Like a darkening cloud,
she came close to me
whispered in my ear...
"I am......
wherever words end their loud whisper,
where noises seem to cease,
you'll find me."

She became my everlasting friend,
Lost am I,she is there
Alone am I,she is there
I don't know her name...
I call her..."my shadow"